A E-Zine For Those Recovering From Addictive Behaviors

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by Elisabeth A. Freeman

The other day as I took a walk with my daughter, far above our giggles and talk I could hear the sound of birds chirping. In Michigan, although we hear a variety of birds cawing and cooing all through the year, we can be assured that Spring is near, when we hear the blissful, joyful tunes of the Robin.

I paused and briefly looked around, hoping to see our friendly State Bird, but not one Robin was in sight. Although I couldn’t see the birds, we walked in harmony listening to their chanting tune.

The grass had turned a bright green, the trees were beginning to bud, the air even had a fresh, new smell, and the sun was shining brightly.

All the signs of Spring were in the air, and we knew that once again everything would blossom with a brand new life.

All the signs of God and His coming are everywhere too. We feel His Spirit in the Wind, we hear his voice in the rolling thunder, and we see His promise in every rainbow. The signs are all there. But sometimes we ignore the facts.

Just as we have to prepare for Spring here in Michigan, by putting our winter garments away and getting dressed for Spring, spiritually we must prepare to put off the old sinful nature and put on the new nature of God.

I’m always eager to spring into Spring, but more than that, I like to take off the things of the past, lay them at Jesus’ feet, and anxiously wait to see what new plan He has for me each day!

By Elisabeth A. Freeman

Up here in Michigan we gladly welcome spring after a long, cold winter. In fact, I look forward to every season. In the summer, since my children are on break from school, we can do a lot more activities together. The fall ushers in cooler nights and a refreshing breeze after a hot summer. And then it’s winter again, and although it’s bitter cold outside, I spend most of my time in my warm house writing as the inspiration comes.

But even as often as our seasons change in Michigan we tend to get tired of the heat in the summer, the cold in the winter, the wind in the fall, and the rain in the spring. In fact, many of us Michigander’s pack up for the winter and head some place warm, or in the summer visit somewhere cooler.

It seems as humans, we’re never quite happy with the seasons. We always want something different.

And I find that in many marriages today couples want something different after they’ve been married for awhile. "If my husband would be more athletic," or "If my wife would just sit down and watch sports." We think that if our mates change everything will be great.

I used to pray that John would become more spiritual. I knew in my mind that he was the one who needed to change. However, our relationship started growing more distant. I realized that just as I can’t change the weather, I have no control over John. As I prayed and asked for wisdom, God showed me that I needed to look deeper, try harder, and show John even more love in that particular season of our lives. He showed me that just as we have to prepare for winter in Michigan, so we too must prepare ourselves for seasons in our marriage. Instead of always looking for a way to escape, stick it out. Because this season too, shall pass.

By Paul Cook

"Behold, You desire truth in the inward parts, and in the hidden part You will make me to know wisdom" Psalm 51:6 NKJV

Truth is the weapon God has given us to destroy strongholds. He desires that we have the truth in our inward parts, such that no lie would have a sheltered place in us. He desires that all people know the truth (1 Timothy 2:4), and has given us the Spirit of Truth and the scriptures to help us do so.

Satan uses lies to blind people from truth and take them captive to do his will (2 Timothy 2:26). He is the father of lies and has no truth in him (John 8:44). The shield of faith is the piece of our spiritual armor that extinguishes all of Satan’s "fiery darts" (Ephesians 6:16). Its strength is based on faith in the truth. Satan’s objective is therefore to weaken or destroy our faith by enticing us to believe lies instead of God’s word. If we succumb, our faith in the lies will lead us to do Satan’s will.

If you have strayed into bondage through the devil’s lies, God invites you to turn from your ways and embrace the truth. Start by confessing your sin to God and asking him to help you fully repent. Ask him to help you recognize the lies you have believed. Then, pursue and embrace the truth through three key ways:

1. Abide in the word of God: This means to hold fast to its teachings and live in accordance with them. The word nourishes us spiritually, and is useful for wisdom and training in righteousness. It fully equips us for every good work (2 Timothy 3:15-16). Jesus said that if we abide in God’s word we will know the truth and the truth will set us free (John 8:31-32).
2. Exercise yourself toward godliness: Godliness is the goal that we are called to progressively move to in our spiritual walk. We increase in godliness as we apply the word to our lives. Exercising godliness is like physical exercise in that it can be difficult, painful and challenging. It brings spiritual strengthening and profitability in all things (1 Timothy 4:7-8).

3. Be sensitive to and yield to the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of Truth: He will guide us into all truth and remind us of God’s word (John 16:13). We will remain sensitive to the Spirit by obeying the Spirit’s promptings and keeping away from evil. If we ignore the Spirit, our heart will become callused from the deceitfulness of sin (Hebrews 3:13). A callous heart is fertile ground for deception!

These can be challenging tasks. God didn’t intend that we do this alone. He has given us the Holy Spirit, the scriptures and the people in the Body of Christ to encourage, teach and edify us in truth. We need not fear failure. God’s Spirit lives in us and will help us along the way. We can confidently stand in faith on the truth, knowing we will not give way when the winds of deception blow.

By Wesley King

So far I have indicated that lust, pornography, and sexual addictions are a problem within the church. I have also argued that few churches adequately address these issues. So, in this last installment we will look at three ways churches can begin dealing with these problems.

The first way to begin combating this sinful stronghold is with openness. Without open dialogue about sexual subjects, no change can occur within the church. For far too long, sexual issues have been banned from discussion in churches. To our shame, it is clear that the Puritans discussed sex and dealt with sexual issues in a more open manner than the church does today.

We live in a world literally saturated with sex and sexual images. A person cannot even buy groceries without being assaulted by sexual images on the cover of almost every magazine. People must begin destroying the stigma attached to sex. We must begin in a loving, Christ-like manner so as not to offend any through our lack of tact. But, we must press in so this can and will be discussed within the churches abroad. Not to overburden our already weary church leadership, but church leaders must lead the way into this battle against this sexual demon that’s taking over our land.

Second, accountability needs to become a widespread, if not a unanimous aspect of church life. All can benefit from being accountable to other Christians, but this is especially true for those struggling with secret sins, like addictions to pornography and sex. Certain concerned individuals already have sought out accountability partners, but this needs to become more than an individual desire. The church must make a commitment as a whole to promote and encourage accountability among its members. No church can force a person to do anything, nor should they, but if the majority of the church is involved in accountability groups, then those few who find it a little daunting will be more likely to join since they know they are not alone. There is safety and strength in numbers.

Lastly, there needs to be a support structure within the church. Just like a person who diets and loses weight often gains back the weight through lack of self-control and support, so does the recovering sex or porn addict. Without the proper support, they too will fall back into their sinful habits.

Support should be in place once there is openness and accountability, but even with those things in place we must be careful not to let anyone slip through the cracks. Accountability groups should remain true to their purpose to provide support for those who are struggling, and with a sense of openness no one should feel ashamed of their sin because "all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." (Rom. 3:23)

With these three elements in place in churches, the stronghold of lust, pornography, and sex addiction is sure to be broken.

The book of James says, "Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed." (James 5:16)

People need healing from these afflictions and they must be able to come to the church without fear or shame to confess their sins and receive the healing they can only find in Jesus Christ. Let us strive to make our churches a haven of rest for those suffering from lust and sexual addictions.

*The Envelope Please*

Morris had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high-tech corporation.

The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and presented him with three numbered envelopes, #1,#2, and #3. "Open these if you run up against a problem you don't think you can solve," the departing CEO said.

Things went along pretty smoothly, but six months later, sales took a downturn and Morris was catching a lot of heat. About at his wit's end, he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope. The message read, "Blame your predecessor."

Morris, the new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at the feet of the previous CEO. Satisfied with his comments, the press -- and Wall Street -- responded positively. Sales began to pick up and the problem was soon behind him.

About a year later, the company was again experiencing a slight dip in sales, combined with serious product problems. Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope. The message read, "Reorganize." This he did, and the company quickly rebounded.

After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again fell on difficult times. Morris went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope.

The message said, "Prepare three envelopes."

*Little Tim's Goldfish*

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence.

Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What'cha doing, Tim?"

"My goldfish died," replied the boy tearfully, without looking up. "I've just buried him."

The neighbor was concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Tim patted down the last heap of earth, then replied, "That's because he's inside your dumb cat."